It began with my parents, when they made a covenant in front of God and His people.
My father is a pastor and my mother is a nurse. It is old fashion how they met. Both my parents were introduced to each other through their parents. My father went with a ring in hand, utterly trusting his parents, while my mother did the same. But there is a small detail that cannot be left out. A member of my mother’s church, in prayer received a message from God; that my mother would become a pastor’s wife to someone like Samuel the prophet. I find it romantic how my father proposed to my mother at the end of the first date. It is incredibly more romantic how they continue to stay in covenant with each other.
During college my sister and I would often come home sporadically during the week and weekends in search of food and rest, only to find the house deserted. The next morning we would find takeout bags in the kitchen; remnants of my parent’s date the night before.
I have had the pleasure of watching my father do the most romantic thing a man can do. The most romantic thing began with my mom working nights and raising us while we moved from California (where I was born) to New Jersey (where my sister was born) to Washington to Alaska (where my father was ordained) to California back to Washington. Of course my father helped while my mother was away at work, but the general gist of it all, from my birth until my high school years was, my mom supported my father’s dreams.
Somewhere towards the end of high school my mother ventured into real estate and business. My mother is not a businesswoman. Without assets it is difficult to not only start a business but establish a business without the intention of any profit. Anyhow, after what I would consider bad investment after another; I confronted my father during the middle of college. I asked him, do you realize what you are doing letting Mom risk financial ruin? I asked him repeatedly if he knew what he was doing…
This was his answer…
He explained to me that my mother had stuck by him, supported him spiritually, emotionally, and physically while he pursued his dreams. He was now in a position to stick by my mom, supporting her spiritually, emotionally, and physically while she pursued her dreams; supporting her through every illogical investment, and that, that was an intense romantic act of love, the love of God.
I grew up in a good Christian home; my father is a Presbyterian pastor. Lower middle class from then until now, we managed every need and even some wants. I met Jesus Christ at a youth retreat between middle and high school. I learned who Jesus Christ was and what he did. I was saved but I did not know Jesus Christ.
As a child my parents were legalistic Calvinistic Christians. We were allowed to listen to the church music, classical music and the Sound of Music, Mary Poppins, and Disney soundtracks. No pop music, Nintendo, anything resembling a gun, and the like. In light of everything now, looking back, I am grateful my parents protected my childhood innocence.
I began listening to No Doubt and Oasis by the end of elementary school. In high school my parents were letting me set my curfew; the only rule being that I had to stick to my word. Having been through every clique, from punk rocker, to alternative junkie, to prep, I was going through a techno-rave phase towards the end of high school. Routinely, after a long night of partying, I would come home around 4am Sunday, in order to snooze some before heading to Church to lead praise. In retrospect I should have died many times. I survived because of God’s grace but back then I was completely blinded by my selfishness.
One night, coming home, something felt different. I was getting sick of the partying, but I also made the realization, that while my parents were letting me set my curfew; they were not sleeping until I came home. That was the first time I truly utterly felt loved; the selfless love of God flowing through my parents.
The second time I felt this way was at church. I was walking past my mom who was in prayer. She was crying, which was not unusual. What was unusual was that I stopped and listened. She was praying for my sister and me. Any other time I may have thought it was touching to hear my mother pray for me, but this time it was different. I wanted to change.
I am stubborn and I went through my freshman year of college doing terrible my first year. It did not help that my father stepped down from head pastor to take a sabbatical helping the regional Presbytery. The church routine was over. Through God’s grace I ended up in a small group. Towards the middle of the second year with my small group, our small group leader thought it was a good idea to write testimonies. For the life of me, I just could not come up with one; I worried. To make things worse my small group leader approached me and asked; if you died today, could you say with certainty that you would go to heaven? I am glad he asked me, because now I can answer with certainty that I will, and in the following years, God gave me a life, a life reflecting Him; a testimony.
At the end of my second year in college, I sincerely asked God to transform me and to use me as his tool. At the time, I was completing medical school prerequisite courses as well as applying for other opportunities to explore medicine and gain medical and research experience. From that time onward, God answered my prayers in miraculous ways. I was given fellowships, scholarships, and research experience one after enough; at the right time in the right way with the right people. I was certain that God would send me immediately into medical school so I could quickly become a doctor; in a position to serve and be a tool of God.
I had everything backwards.
I wanted to go immediately into medical school. I applied broadly to low and middle tier schools where people with my score and background are a shoe-in. My arrogance got me in nowhere.
God told me to go work and volunteer more. I am so thankful I did not enter immediately into medical school.
I wanted to work in the ER of a large adult trauma center. I wanted to experience blood and drama.
God gave me a job in the ER of the best pediatric hospital in the northwest. Now I know my work will be in pediatrics.
I wanted to volunteer in South America or Africa. Asia was not even a consideration, with China being one of the last countries on Earth I planned to step foot in. During college, I did not even glance at the people who approached me to help the North Korean humanitarian cause.
God sent me to China, to a city along the North Korean border, to help indigenous Korean-Chinese and North Koreans. Those three months transformed me more than in the years it took me to get there.
I wanted to go to public health school for an MPH in epidemiology after medical school. I applied to medical schools again. Now with a more open heart, I applied to public health schools as well. I was rejected from every medical school.
God gave me acceptances to the top three public health schools in the country.
I will have the opportunity to attend the number two epidemiology program for a financial bargain while having the priceless opportunity to spend two more years nearby my family.
I wanted to continue volunteering elsewhere. In the past I mocked those who went to teach English in Korea.
God sent me to Korea, not just to teach English, but to teach English for free. These past 7 months have been nothing short of amazing.
Lastly, however by far the most significant…
I wanted to have everything in clean order before getting married and started a family. I thought it was silly to travel to another country, even if it was Korea, to find a wife. Among the many factors, my arrogance contributed to my pickiness which kept me single all these years.
God did not just send me to Korea, but he introduced me to my future wife.
I now know who I will serve and share, as we pursue a purpose driven life together.
It took time to build up to this significant event. It started with my parents. However, things started moving during the summer of 2007 when I went to China. Before China, Christianity was still a religion to me. Through my experiences in China I realized that Christianity is a relationship with the Trinity; a relationship with God, the Holy Spirit, and Jesus Christ. A missionary doctor couple I met in Yanji, China specialized in pre-marital counseling and put some of us who were volunteering at the local hospital through a pre-marital course. As I mentioned before, I had planned on marrying after becoming settled. However, through the course, I battled my arrogance, reducing my long list of wants in a spouse to around ten. More importantly I was around a variety of missionary couples, from grandparents to newlyweds. Also while in China, being far from my parents, I started to look at my parents as people, as a couple deep in love, in God’s love. I wanted to experience God’s love in this way. I started praying for a spouse.
After returning home I continued praying and developing a relationship with Jesus Christ. I realized I was lacking in one important aspect of my relationship with Jesus Christ, I did not have a healthy prayer life. If I was to become closer to Jesus Christ I would have to start talking to him more often. Realizing that Korean-Christians have a healthy prayer life, I planned to take a long term trip to Seoul, Korea after taking the GRE and applying to medical and public health schools.
My time in Seoul, Korea has been all attributed to God’s grace. I have had a free roof over my head and have been given odd jobs here so I can eat and travel around. I also had the wonderful opportunity to volunteer with two organizations, Dunamis and Hanaro. At Hanaro, I had the chance to develop relationships with middle and high school kids, helping them with English and math skills. Also talking and playing sports with them in their free time. With Dunamis I got to share and become a part of the lives of many college students, supporting them as they improved their conversational English.
On March 29th, I met Jodie Eun Young Han for the very first time. She was invited by one of the leaders of Dunamis to see what Dunamis is all about. She ended up attending the class I was helping. I remember she was cute, wearing a Nike hoodie and jeans, dressed down and comfortable. I remember her Australian accent and her energy, she was full of life. I joked and flirted with her because she is older than me and because the group leaders told me to do what it took to get her to join Dunamis as a teacher.
On April 12th, I had plans to have dinner with some church friends. However, one of the Dunamis leaders started a new business managing a dermatology/plastic surgery clinic in downtown Seoul. Just as I was arriving, Jodie’s group was leaving. As she was getting up to go, I grabbed her arm and asked her for her number. I was surprised when she obliged. She left with her group and that was the end of that.
Around that time I was interested in a woman. I knew that this woman was not interested in me so I wanted to know how I should work out the situation, to either pursue her or move on. For advice and wisdom, I decided to have dinner with Jodie and ask her for her opinion. She was older and had promised me dinner if I ever called.
On April 18th, I met with Jodie and had dinner at her favorite Gangnam restaurant, Dos Tacos. I told her about my situation as she shared her relationship experiences. She asked me to pray for her future marriage and I asked her to pray for mine. It was just so relaxing and comfortable. As we walked from Gangnam to Yangjae, where we finished off the evening over coffee, I remember not wanting the night to end.
After that night, two things happened. I asked Jodie if she wanted to share our quiet times. I felt I could learn from her wisdom and gain experience sharing my quiet time life with a friend. Secondly, I cleaned out my heart of any potential romantic interests.
On May 2nd, I met with Jodie and had dinner again at her favorite Gangnam restaurant. Before heading out to meet her, I considered taking a guitar. I knew she liked Hillsong and thought we could sing some praise songs together. I ended up not taking the guitar. However on our walk home, we walked by a quiet break area between two office buildings. The first time we walked by we just walked past the area, but this time we walked in, only to find a couple each playing a guitar. I asked the couple if I could borrow a guitar and they obliged. We sang Hosanna (by Hillsong) together that night. We made plans to meet the following week.
A few days before meeting her for the third time, I decided it was best to study and develop the relationships that God had given me. Shortly after meeting Jodie and before resolving the interest in the woman, God took away all of my part-time jobs. I took this as a sign that I should become more serious in my studies preparing for the MCAT. I also took it as a sign that I should no longer pursue new relationships but develop those he had already provided. However, the second I let go of all things relationship related, the only image and name that came into my head was Jodie. I asked God, really? – And he said yes. Wow!
I intended to see Jodie with an ultimatum. I decided that meeting her in the evenings like we had, I was doing her a disfavor and disrespecting her. After all, she asked me to pray for her future husband the first time I met her. If I kept meeting her in the evenings she definitely was not going to meet her future husband. Only now did I realize I could be him. If this was God’s person, God’s time, and God’s timing, she would be thinking and praying the same thing.
On May 8th, I met with Jodie at Yangjae to have Gimbap and go for a walk along Yangjaecheon. At the start of dinner I told her I could not see her like this anymore. She said she would miss me. Over the walk at Yangjaecheon, I told her I could not see her like this anymore. This time I explained myself, that I was disrespecting her by meeting her like this, and that I did not want to hurt her feelings or have my feelings hurt. I told her I was falling for her. She said she would miss me and would cry if she could not see me again. We continued walking and she told me she had something to say after we got some ice cream. On our way back after ice cream, we sat down. Then she spoke…
I realize I am very human. While a sinner, by God’s grace I may sin no more. I planned to hand everything over to God after he gave everything to me; serving God after he made me a doctor, after he gave me this and that, everything. Now I better understand that my time, dreams, and career are not for me to give to God; I cannot give God what is not mine to give.
I realize I cannot love on my own accord. Because God is God, God is love, and God is the source of all love, I can only love others with the love that flows from Him. Because of sin I am a broken mirror, however only Christ’s redemption sacrifice, and through the continual work of the Holy spirit can I be mended to reflect God’s perfect love, grace, and glory.
Now, it begins with Jodie and Jason, as we make a covenant in front of God and His people.
